Breaking News-SADDAM DENIES PURSUING ‘NUCULAR’ WEAPONS

"No Evidence of Nucular Program in Iraq", Reporter Says

Responding to last night’s period of questioning in Iraq where Saddam was repeatedly accused of attempting to acquire “nucular” weapons, President Saddam Hussein of Iraq today categorically denied having a “nucular” weapons program of any kind.
“Iraq does not now nor has it ever had a ‘nucular’ weapons program,” Saddam said in a terse official statement. “Nor does it have any idea what a ‘nucular’ weapon is.”
The young translator from Southpaw Kentucky apparently did not understand his accent had confused Saddam... So once again, we are unsure of Saddam's secret weapon program.