How To Be A Bully At The Beach

This may be helpful for those of you who frequent the coastal zones.
A: Locate freshly built sandcastles (especially those strategically located above the damage range of the tide). Upon finding the castle or sculpture, throw a Frisbee in the general direction then try to catch it yourself and "fall" on the art form.
B: Play Coast Cop and confiscate all beachballs, frisbees, nerf toys, and sand toys. If the kids resist, use your height as leverage and use your foot to push the child and pry loose the entertainment object.
C: Bring a blow-dart kit and a loud boombox. Find a quiet spot on the beach (preferably next to the company of out-of-state families) Crank up your generator to power your 550Watt system, then leave and look for kites to decimate with your blow-darts.