How to Have a Hi-Fi system

Today's music industry and their products demand everyone own a hi-fi sound system... However if you can't afford the expensive silver coated amp and speakers- Help has arrived.
First, Go to your nearest SPCA and either buy a dog, or "rescue" one during the night. This will be your "woofer". Obviously the larger the canine, the better bass lows and drop-offs.
Second, sneak into your neighbor's yard or find a stray pigeon and place it into a cage... This will be your "tweeter".
Third, it might be helpful to have a "pre-amp" and "amp" to enhance the sound quality- this can be done by making small cones to fit around the mouth of the "speakers"... the smaller cone is your "pre-amp" the larger exterior cone is your main amp.
Hopefully I didn't forget anything... Power supply is optional (if you do decide to use electricity keep the voltage low or you might "burn out" or "kill" your speakers.)